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June 26, 2007

Some Very Specific Advice

A really ripe and juicy nectarine is a true taste treat, but you probably shouldn't eat it directly over your computer's keyboard.

You're welcome.

Posted by john at June 26, 2007 09:01 AM

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Christian | June 26, 2007 09:08 AM

A "sticky" keyboard thread?

Uh, no.

That will be all.

John Scalzi | June 26, 2007 09:17 AM

Now, now. Christian. It's my site.

Sticky keyboards! Sticky keyboards!

Anyway, I'm trying to help people avoid them.

Janiece | June 26, 2007 09:26 AM

Now you tell me...

My keyboards are a mess, for the very reason you warn against. I'm such a desk-slob, although weirdly, I'm not really a slob about anything else.

Steve | June 26, 2007 09:28 AM

Nectarines also gum up mouse balls if you drip on the mouse pad.

chang, myspacier than ever! | June 26, 2007 09:38 AM

After a friend poured beer onto a keyboard in my studio, there was a no drinking policy in place. Not very rock.n.roll but there you go.

The only fruit that really goes with computing is a banana. Make of that what you will, Christian.

Cassie | June 26, 2007 09:49 AM

How did I know the banana advice was from Chang?

If you have nectarines, why are you computing anyway? It's impossible to fully appreicate a ripe nectarine when your attention is divided.

Shawn Powers | June 26, 2007 09:53 AM

While *this* keyboards hasn't been graced with fruit juice, it's still rather nasty looking, and I have no idea why it still works.

Here's the proof.

Christian | June 26, 2007 10:03 AM

Lets see. I've got my:

Mineral water
Lucky Strikes (but no ashtray, alas)
Pepcid AC
Gordon's Gin
Cell Phone
Baked Potato!

Did I Miss Anything?

Brad | June 26, 2007 10:13 AM

I got a really cool keyboard on eBay a while back, the whole thing is made out of flexible silicone and submersible. If i can get a submersible trackball and I could guarantee I wouldn't get my laptop wet, I would rarely get out of the hottub.

Steve Buchheit | June 26, 2007 10:33 AM

I can hear the ants forming up and marching on Scalzi's keyboard from here.

Mfitz | June 26, 2007 11:02 AM

They had a thing on NPR last week about putting keyboards in the dishwasher. Apparently it's OK for 99% of them, even if they don't say so on the label. Don't do it if you have a wireless keyboard or any other keyboard that takes batteries though.

The secret is not using the dry part of the cycle and making sure to stack it so it doesn't end up sitting in standing water at any time in the wash cycle. I'm guessing that means top shelf only.

The reporter washed her keyboard and it came out just fine.

P J Evans | June 26, 2007 11:23 AM

It's enough to make me want one of those no-moving-parts-bigger-than-an-electron keyboards I saw ads for back in the days of S-100 bus computers (you could turn the audio feedback on and off).

Wish *I* had one of those nectarines. But I have a "black" apricot in the fridge.

zakur | June 26, 2007 12:15 PM

Just put it in the dishwasher

Nonny | June 26, 2007 01:06 PM

LOL, I've done that too. Nectarine and mango juice FTL.

If you get about three or four paper towels and wrap the fruit in it as you're eating, though, it'll catch most of the dripping juice and keep it from hitting your keyboard. (Yeah, because I can't stay away from the computer long enough to eat a damn nectarine. :P)

Joe Hill | June 26, 2007 01:20 PM

Additionally, trying to bang out a couple pages while eating a Fluffernutter is a BIG mistake. Something I am sorry to say I know from first-hand experience.

Nathan | June 26, 2007 01:22 PM


Your psychic abilities are truly amazing. I just got home from the supermarket and after putting the groceries away, decided to see what was going on over at the Whatever. And decided that one of those lovely juicy nectarines I just bought would taste great right about now.

Only your intervention prevented me from mixing my Appleā„¢ with an orange (well, nectarine, but you know).

MWT | June 26, 2007 01:49 PM

At this point, I've basically learned not to eat most fruits anywhere other than while standing over the sink. Even if there's no drippage in inconvenient places, there's still the goo that gets all over my hands. So it's handy to have running water nearby...

ged | June 26, 2007 02:53 PM

...uh...is this another one of those "show off" entries where we are supposed to post comment after comment about nectarines and eating messing foodstuffs at the keyboard while you and your friends just laugh and laugh your asses off...?


I hate eating pizza at the computer, which I just did today for lunch, cause it ends up getting grease all ove the keyboard, then my laptop ends up smelling like tomato sauce for the next week.

Happy to oblige.

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