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June 08, 2007

The Earmuffs, They Do Nothing

I just heard a cover of "Suffragette City" by Poison.

Every rose has its thorn, indeed. This one has been jammed into my ear.

If you dare to sample it for yourself, it is here. And may God have mercy on your cochleae.

Posted by john at June 8, 2007 01:29 PM

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Comments

Christian | June 8, 2007 01:39 PM

Their cover of "What I Like About You" was also tasty, delicious, and filling.

Please sir, can I have some more?

Nathan | June 8, 2007 01:43 PM

Truly lame. All over the country, there are wedding bands celebrating the fact that they can do better.

Patrick M. | June 8, 2007 02:02 PM

This is a perfect example of "Oh god, this milk has spoiled... Here, try it."

Thank you, John. Only a true friend would share.

Chang, for rizzle. | June 8, 2007 02:09 PM

No, thanks. I think I've had quite enough of your music recommendations this week. The only way I can get Rehab out of my ears and brain is to play "KINO" by Cabaret Voltaire so loud my cat's holding his ears.

COD | June 8, 2007 02:19 PM

It seems like all mediocre rock bands start, and end, their careers as cover bands.

Adam Lipkin | June 8, 2007 02:23 PM

You can't dissuade me. I will have this album (and frankly, I love their cover of "Your Mama Can't Dance").

D. | June 8, 2007 02:29 PM

Fortunately I have an anti-spyware software guard that blocks this video, but they look like guys who modelled themselves on Spinal Tap.

Perhaps some Edith Piaf? She doesn't rock and the videos are in scratchy black and white, but she does have soul.

joelfinkle | June 8, 2007 02:39 PM

On the subject of covers: Two of my favorite discs are "Deadicated" and "Red Hot + Blue" -- both cover anthologies, and both all over the map but the means are skewed toward awesome.

The first is a Greatful Dead tribute (hence the punny name), and ranges from faithful-but-boring (Suzanne Vega's "China Doll"), spot-on house rockin' (Los Lobos' "Bertha" and Bruce Hornsby's "Jack Straw"), and strangely wrong but exactly right (Jane's Addiction's "Ripple").

The second is modern pop versions of Cole Porter, as an AIDS benefit. U2's "Night and Day" is about the only thing that got airplay, and it's an interesting interpretation, but Iggy Pop and Deborah Harry doing "Did you evah?" is even more topical than the original. Bands that flashed in the pan (Thompson Twins' "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire") to true classics (Aaron Neville's "Still of the Night") mix with rapped versions (Neneh Cherry), death-lounge (Tom Waits) and pub rock (Pogues). Not to be missed.

critter42 | June 8, 2007 02:54 PM

you wanna really shudder? They're touring with Ratt and White Lion! You gotta know Aqua Net must be happy :)

Skip | June 8, 2007 03:30 PM

I agree about Deadicated. I like it quite a bit, although the Indigo Girls cover of 'Uncle John's Band' is probably my favorite on there. The Lyle Lovette cover of 'Friend of the Devil' is also good. Midnight Oil's 'Wharf Rat', not so much.

Looking at the set list on this album, I'm tempted. Really tempted.


Kate | June 8, 2007 03:31 PM

*cries*

I was having a good start to the weekend until that popped up.

Thanks a lot .

Just to get you back. Here is a rather umm interesting version of your "rehab" girlfriend singing "Beat it."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vfdl7-E80Q

She can sing, but apparently, not while drunk.

ebear | June 8, 2007 03:32 PM

One wonders if they get the context behind that song....

Carl Caputo | June 8, 2007 03:49 PM

I hate your gonads, John Scalzi. Everything is ruined forever.

As far as Red, Hot + Blue goes, I really, really dig Annie Lennox's version of "Ev'rytime You Say Goodbye."

JerolJ | June 8, 2007 04:02 PM

I believe "Deadicated" had that sublime cover of "Casey Jones" by Warren Zevon and David Lindley.

But this Poisoned is just 50 kinds of wrong. These guys never were great musicians but that has to be one of the most clueless Bowie covers I have ever heard. I could it even make it to the two minute mark. This makes Great White's cover of Ian Hunter's "Once Bitten" look masterful.

Rob | June 8, 2007 04:10 PM

that was aggressively stupid and impressively horrible

DJL | June 8, 2007 04:31 PM

Oh come on. That wasn't too bad. You want bad...

Now THIS is bad!

I can't remember how I found this, but it just isn't pretty.

A cover of Rush's Tom Sawyer

Smith | June 8, 2007 05:26 PM

Sure, it's wrong in theory. But the thing was just so uninspired as to leave an almost complete absence of impression on me.

Anne C. | June 8, 2007 05:26 PM

Argh, Kate! I managed to not fall for Scalzi's "hey this milk's bad, here, taste", but I had to see the "Beat it". [clutches ears and shudders] Church singing the words so clearly only made Winehouse's slurring more obvious.
[shudders again and goes in search of aural orange sherbert]

Tania | June 8, 2007 06:05 PM

Drat. That was me.

Erbo | June 8, 2007 09:19 PM

AAAHHHH!!! I need an emergency dose of Warmen's "Beyond Abilities," STAT!

(If you need one, too, it's the soundtrack to this video featuring footage from the anime Stratos 4.)

izzy | June 8, 2007 11:24 PM

Hey man

- here's something that will help you recover:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TvtDD98rK-o

Tolladay | June 8, 2007 11:45 PM

Okay, so the other day I quite by accident heard a cover of Joni Mitchell's "A Case of You" by um.. er... Prince. Completely redone like a old school Motown slow jam.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dyb58JJdR8Y

It's, well, not what you'd expect.

The images appear to be from Purple Rain, but the song is right.

CosmicDog | June 9, 2007 04:06 AM

That is one of the most evil things anyone has ever done to me. Your disclaimer was not strong enough, Scalzi.

skip | June 9, 2007 11:45 AM

Just to pile on, here's cracked.com's list of
'top 20 worst cover songs of all time'. There are some spectacularly bad ones there. When Celine Dion singing 'You Shook Me All Night Long' is number 20, that's a harbinger of doom, I think.

http://www.cracked.com/index.php?name=News&sid=1713

gerrymander | June 10, 2007 02:51 PM

joelfinkle, if you haven't heard it you might want to track down a copy of "Stay Awake", 90s covers of classic Disney songs. You've never heard "Cruella DeVille" until you've heard the Replacements' version.

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