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September 23, 2006

Weekend Update

This is it. I'm gone until Monday. Try not to eat all the jellybeans while I'm out.

Posted by john at September 23, 2006 12:55 PM

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Dane | September 23, 2006 01:08 PM

Jellybeans? I deserve those too...

Chang | September 23, 2006 01:30 PM


I like black jellybeans. Used to think thye were rabbit poo. But then I developed a licorice problem and well, you know how that goes.

Robert Nealis | September 23, 2006 01:31 PM

I won't eat all the Jellies, I'll leave the bitter black licorice ones for you. (cuz they're my favorite and thats how much I like you. Really. I'm not weird)

Nathan | September 23, 2006 01:42 PM

Did anyone else hear that?


I think there's someone else in my brain!!!!

Oops, never mind. just the TV.

Anonymous | September 23, 2006 02:35 PM

Bertie Botts? Love the grass flavored ones.

Josh Jasper | September 23, 2006 03:41 PM

There were jellybeans? Who ate them? Bastards didn't share!

Diplomachismo | September 23, 2006 05:47 PM

It was clear to me that when he left I was supposed to hog them all. They are in a secret location four inches from my navel. If you can find them- I will share.

Josh Jasper | September 23, 2006 07:11 PM

Eeew. Spleen. You can keep that.

Jon | September 23, 2006 11:15 PM

No, 4 inches BELOW the navel.

Lee | September 24, 2006 12:13 AM

I'm guessing you are off to find someone to recommend your books. Earlier this week, Chavez recommended Noam Chomsky's book at his speech in the U.N. Not to be outdone, Bush recommended Musharaf's forthcoming book which was conveniently used to evade answering questions from reporters. How can you top that? Maybe, you ought to get another crazy guy like Kim Il-Jong to recommend your book(s)?

Dane | September 24, 2006 09:29 AM

There's a photoshop project if I ever I heard one. Put your book inplace of Noam Chomsky's. Hugo Chavez sputtering about the evils of America based on the timeline of Old Man's War...that'll sell a few more copies...

Diplomachismo | September 24, 2006 09:35 AM

Bush suggested a book...he he he...too rich.

The last book he read had talking animals in it...and by "read" I mean "drew mustaches on the illustrations with a green crayon".

Kevin Q | September 24, 2006 12:27 PM

___ ___
/ \___/ \
| |
\ /

Jelly Bean. (Maybe)


Kevin Q | September 24, 2006 12:27 PM

Or not.


The Harvey | September 24, 2006 12:54 PM

I think we need more beans for the jelly. Would this increase book sales?????

who knows be sides the Shadow....

have a good weekend John..

the rabbit strikes again

Ginny | September 24, 2006 01:00 PM

I have taken all the yellow jellybeans. Green ones used to be cool because they were lime or lemon/lime, but the candy world conspired with me a couple of years ago so now almost all green jellybeans are bitter apple.

Bitter apple? Who decided that this was a good idea? First, get everyone hooked on lime, then pull the carpet out from under us by switching flavors.

Whenever I think of it, I can only quote Ricardo Montalban in "Star Trek: the Wrath of Khan":

From hell's heart, I stab at thee. For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee...

BRING BACK LIME. (shakes fist)

Ginny | September 24, 2006 01:18 PM

Oh dammit. I mean conspired against me. Those bitter apple jellybeans have me so upset.

I have to go cry in a corner now.

Diplomachismo | September 24, 2006 02:53 PM

I got some lime-flavored ones on the way...slightly used but I hardly chewed them.

Or are you gonnna turn all picky and indignant at me too?

BELOW? I'd say they're behind it, probably just to the jejunum by now.

Dan | September 24, 2006 04:57 PM

I've only got Twizzlers... But, you know? They're hollow inside; so I may actually be able to have some jelly bean stuffed Twizzlers. Ooo.. That would be so cool.

Ginny | September 24, 2006 05:14 PM


In some countries, I bet you could market slightly chewed jellybeans as organic jam.

...not that I'd buy any. I mean I'm desperate for lime, but not that desperate.


Diplomachismo | September 24, 2006 05:40 PM

Organic? Are you kidding?

Milk from cows that lived the life I do wouldn't qualify as "organic". I spend most of my life indoors eating artificial foods...speaking of which, I think I will eat this; the last lime-flavored green jellybean in the world...

*laughs maniacally*

...that's for calling me Jon...

Ginny | September 24, 2006 06:07 PM

I shall call you cruel henceforth, Cruel Sir.


Diplomachismo | September 24, 2006 06:31 PM

You can have it once my twenty-three feet have done with it. Care for a cup of saffron tea while you wait? It's warm...

-Cruel Sir

Ginny | September 24, 2006 08:16 PM

Saffron tea?


Lee | September 24, 2006 08:17 PM

Re jellybeans - nothing to worry about. Ronald Reagan is already dead.

Dan | September 24, 2006 08:31 PM

I'm just wild about Saffron... lalala...

Thomas Nixon | September 24, 2006 09:40 PM

I need to contact Hugo Chavez and see if he'll hold one of my books for me. Apparently, the sales on Chomsky's book have gone up significantly.

Diplomachismo | September 24, 2006 09:45 PM

For you, I'll even serve in my best porcelain.

Do you take a dollop of cream on your custard? I'll have to whip it up for you but it only takes a moment...*where's my cream of tartar?*

As that comes ready, try my buttered scone.


Perhaps a ladyfinger eclair?

I do love a tea party...

Ginny | September 25, 2006 01:33 AM

Oh, sure. Tempt me with a buttered scone. I bet they'd find my body in an alley, skin dyed with saffron and a lime jellybean smashed into my forehead.

Dan | September 25, 2006 08:38 AM

Don't bogart the lime jellybeans, my friend.

J. Dirac | September 25, 2006 09:08 AM

I like black jellybeans.

After what happened last time I ate some, no thanks.

Tripp | September 25, 2006 02:52 PM


Are you sure those bitter apples aren't sour apples? Around these parts we seem to have gotten sour apple everything, which in my book of flavors is near the bottom next to watermelon.

Ginny | September 25, 2006 04:57 PM

Bitter apple, sour apple...same sh*t, different name.

But how dare--how DARE you malign watermelon flavored candy! I can just hear Willy Wonka (Gene Wilder, not Johnny Depp) yelling "GOOD DAY, SIR!"

Nathan | September 25, 2006 05:24 PM

I gotta vote with Ginny on the watermelon thing. Them's fightin' words, Tripp.

Oh, BTW, I ordered "Agent to the Stars" from one of the alternate booksellers on Amazon. Imagine my delight when I opened it and found that its part of a limited signed edition (1140 of 1500)

Lucky me....Yay!

And Scalzi,if I had't known you were odd from Whatever, I'd sure know something's up from your signature. I'm no expert, but there's some dark psychology in that signature.

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