« Public Speaking; Various Questions | Main | Why I Deserve an "Android's Dream" ARC: A Contest »

September 21, 2006

Hugo Chavez Had It Wrong


I am the devil! George Bush is, at best, an imp.

Yeah, I'm letting off some post-novel steam. Why do you ask?

I have to say, there's something about my head that makes it particularly good for turning into your basic Photoshop devil. Personally I think it's all about the eyebrows. In day to day life my eyebrows are, at best, unremarkable, but when required they are capable of Nicholson-like arching. I'll note that the shape of the eyebrows above has not been Photoshopped in any way. That's all me, baby.

What I'm particularly proud of is that I did this Photoshoppery after I finished my novel, not before, thus avoiding the dread "how's the book coming along?" questions that would inevitably ensue. The book is done, damn you! And what I say damn you, clearly, I mean it.

Ironically, I did a photo shoot today for a magazine article. None of those pictures look like this one. So far as I know.

Posted by john at September 21, 2006 06:49 PM

Trackback Pings

TrackBack URL for this entry:


Janiece | September 21, 2006 07:17 PM

Perhaps your head's tendency to make good fodder for photo-shop devilry has to do with the lack of hair where the horns would traditionally go.

Just sayin'...

Hugh Casey | September 21, 2006 07:18 PM

Can we use that photo of you for the program book at Philcon? *grin*

John Scalzi | September 21, 2006 07:18 PM


I would be offended if you didn't!

Mary Robinette Kowal | September 21, 2006 07:34 PM

That's Just Plain Evil.

Dan Geiser | September 21, 2006 08:16 PM

"Ironically, I did a photo shoot today for a magazine article. None of those pictures look like this one. So far as I know."

Perhaps the camera captured your true essence?

Jon Hansen | September 21, 2006 08:16 PM

Those are some damned impressive eyebrows.

Chad Orzel | September 21, 2006 08:30 PM

So, when's the deadline for your next book?

John Scalzi | September 21, 2006 08:43 PM

When I damn well get to it, Chad.

Nathan | September 21, 2006 08:58 PM



KafkaesquĆ­ | September 21, 2006 09:13 PM

Hard to take you serious as the Devil with that darn twinkle in your eye.

Chang | September 21, 2006 09:19 PM

Is there a teeth-whitening filter in PhotoShop?

Steve Buchheit | September 21, 2006 09:23 PM

I think Janiece is onto something, it's the large open canvas above the eyebrows and before the hairline that helps :)

Yeah yeah, damn me anyway, won't change where I'm going.

Took the nieces and nephews to a local museum where they have a 360 degree curved mirror. I stood up inside and wondered who that guy was with the INCREADABLY LARGE monks cap/bald spot in there with me. D'oh!

Robert | September 21, 2006 09:23 PM


(lesser-known Motley Crue song)

Chang | September 21, 2006 09:33 PM

Lesser know to some maybe!! Let's give a hizzle to the yizzle for the CRUE!!!

Ginny | September 21, 2006 09:43 PM

I have to go to a photo shoot tomorrow for one of the stations that I work for. I seriously hope the photos come out looking like this one.

...personally, I don't know the facination of photographing people in radio. Most of us have "a face for radio," ifyouknowwhatImean. We're in radio because we'd make televisions cry.

Nathan | September 21, 2006 09:48 PM

Just saw this this on Overheardinnewyork.

Maybe Scalzi can help.

Not-So-Christian Scientists

Son: Is there anything we can do to get Buffy back?
Mom: Well, we could join together in prayer.
Son: Uh huh. Is there anything useful we can do?
Mom: No.

--3 train

Jeff Hentosz | September 21, 2006 09:52 PM

Chang, are you kidding? The 'shop (as really no one calls it) can whiten teeth (and add teeth), brighten eyes, fill in hair, remove zits, trim guts, enlarge boobs, smooth buttocks... We can make you beautiful, darling! Hell, yeah. ]}:-P

Cassie | September 21, 2006 10:21 PM

Jeff, I thought that was what happened when you bought a copy of TGB. Now you're telling me it's all photoshopped?

Anne C. | September 21, 2006 10:57 PM

"Hard to take you serious as the Devil with that darn twinkle in your eye."

I spent a while figuring what they might be, as they don't look like normal twinkles. I was thinking tiny white skulls would be cool "twinkles."

Jeff Hentosz | September 21, 2006 10:58 PM

Easy mistake, Cassie. Actually, it's Adobe InDesign — Photoshop's sister application — that has the Enhance Science Fiction Novel plug-in. Different means to the same ends, though.

Leslie | September 22, 2006 08:46 AM

what no fangs?? Otherwise it's perfect

John Scalzi | September 22, 2006 08:47 AM

Fangs? What am I, a vampire?

bonnie-ann black | September 22, 2006 01:07 PM

who says the devil has no sense of humour? that's the real reason for the fall of Lucifer. he just thought everything was too damned funny. it's GOD who has no sense of humour. JS makes a perfect conduit for the devil.

Kristy | September 22, 2006 02:24 PM

Speaking of photoshopping, you can now get cameras with a slimming feature.

...where are we going, and why are we in a handbasket?

Jonathan | September 22, 2006 04:58 PM

The REAL question is... are those EARS all you?

John Scalzi | September 22, 2006 11:45 PM

No. Thank God.

Dianne | September 23, 2006 12:20 PM

You're the devil? Pshaw! How many people have you tortured and murdered anyway? When you've killed half a million Iraqis and a few hundred thousand miscellaneous others and run multiple concentration camps come back and your application for diabolicalness will be considered. Alternately, maybe you could get Chavez to hold "The Old Man's War" instead of Chomsky next time he denounces someone as the devil. That'd be fairly evil.

Post a comment.

Comments are moderated to stop spam; if your comment goes into moderation, it may take a couple of hours to be released. Please read this for my comment moderation policies.
Preview will not show paragraph breaks. Trust me, they're there.
The proprietor generally responds to commenters in kind. If you're polite, he'll be polite. If you're a jackass, he'll be a jackass. If you are ignorant, he may correct you.
When in doubt, read the comment thread rules.

Remember Me?

(you may use HTML tags for style)